There’s a key power to breaking the stigma of mental health issues for others: being honest about your own. No one wants to be a community project for others to fix. On the other hand, who wouldnt want to find community where we all heal each other?

If we’re true to “love others as you yourself want to be loved” — then we have to admit we want others to love us by caring for us while allowing us to care for them. That means, as we relate to EVERYONE — even those with “problems” — we must admit our own problems and give space for ALL of us broken people with mental health problems to care for each other. Recovery communities like AA have operatiinalized this in their universal greating: “Hi. I’m Ben, and I’m an alcholic.”

My main mental health issues right now have to do with reception. There is a nagging FEELING in me that people don’t really care to know me: they find me useful, but not loveable. I recently spent a week working hard mentally and emotionally. It left me drained and in need of care. God intended for this need to help balance out the role I played in that hard work. But even though my family was making real effort to care and support me, I felt disconnected from what they were doing. I even hurt them with criticism and concerned them because I wasn’t giving healthy feedback for their care.

This realization of my own weekness humanizes me and us in all directions: in the case of those i was serving, it makes me relatable and humanizes them by openning space for their real contribution back into my life. In the case of my family, it rightly acknowledges i cannot do what i am called to do in the world without their loves and support and shows them that their love has a real power to impact the world through their relationships. In the case of our Father, it allows me to feel that i am just a vessel — not the source — and depletion shows dependence on the one who is really doing the work.